in brussels, belgium the region of wallonia has approved a tax on barbecuing. residents will have to pay 20 euros for a grilling season. meanwhile helicopters will be flying over peoples backyards to see if they are barbecuing and if they paid the tax to be able to do so. helicopters? you've got to be kidding! don't helicopters use fuel and in turn pollute the environment? well at least we're not the only country losing our minds in all this global warming b.s. in an effort to show my annoyance at all of this b.s. i plan to barbecue every bloody day for the next five years. hell i'll even barbecue green beans. maybe a penguin or two. check out my footprint! it's HUGE!!!! speaking of penguins.......why is everyone so panicked about the decline? last i checked it isn't a major food source for humans. i'd like to try it though. what else? oh yeah san franfreako is banning plastic bags. crap! does this mean all the trees are going to start crying again? "don't cut us down, it hurts." chainsaw ready! now the proper thing to do here is tell you where i read all this stuff. do the foot work yourself puppies, i gotta go fire up my barbecue and catch some penguins.
penguins taste like chicken